Being the Best Me II - After 34.5 Years, I Finally Get It

Written on Monday, April 20, 2009 by Deeze

After all this time, I finally understand the things my father was trying to tell and teach me.

I understand some of his struggles and vices, because I have the similar ones.
I understand the lessons he tried to teach me.
I don't understand why it took me this long and a over a year after his death to get it.
My dad was a lot smarter than I thought and I knew he was smart.

When I exercise alone, I try to focus on things other than exercising to keep me focused and not feel exhaustion and pain. This morning, I started reflecting on some of the things that I am and realized that my dad somehow orchestrated pretty much all of them. I have no idea how he knew, but I know he knew what he was doing.

As I started looking at my life and being thankful, I started realizing how my dad was used to establish some things I am. As small examples, I look at my career, although I'm not a true techie, my company is technology based, and my dad put a computer in my hands before I was 10.

I am a music loving person. I have well over 12,000 mp3's, but I look at my dad and he had stacks and stacks of albums in the basement when I was young. He wanted me to stick to playing music. He tried to establish athletics and exercise in my life, but I really didn't get it or want to do it then. Now, it's a very important part of my life. That's one of the 100s of things that I wish I would have listened to but I didn't. I remember he and my mom would argue about some of the things that he did for me. My dad's work ethic was so ridiculous, and I find myself working a lot.

In a time that everything is about and focused on women in the media, I think people undervalue and under appreciate a fathers influence. I'm guilty of that myself. As I get older, I'm starting to get it.

I understand my family now. My dad provided the means; my mom was the one that made it happen. It was a tag team. As much as my mom and dad fought, I know they had each others backs and the 3 of us functioned as a unit.

I don't know if it was planned, but being independent and fearless are two things that were preached to me at an early age. Although both of those characteristics get me in trouble in certain situations, at the same time it's one of the characteristics I'm most proud of.

As for me, I'm not getting married until, I'm 100% positive that she has my back and not a fair weather person. I have a vision for my life and my family. At the end of the day, either she's on board or not. I've visioned scenarios of my life without kids or being married, and it wasn't a bad life. However, it goes against my family's beliefs as well as against my spiritual beliefs. So I will at least try to listen to those that know more than me. I'll write more about this in a separate blog.

I think I finally get it. I wish my dad were here so I could tell him I finally get it, but somehow I believe he knew I'd get it at some point.

Being the Best Me

Written on Wednesday, April 15, 2009 by Deeze

Wow, I can't believe I haven't posted since January. I've taken a longer break than expected but I guess so much has been going on with my lack of time, I guess my blog has been cut. I've decided to bring it back because it helps me focus better and it leaves a trail of my thoughts.

Although I'm not doing too bad in life, but I feel like I can do better. I'm always an advocate of self improvement. I have a theme for the remainder of this year. I'm working to be the best me possible. What that means is that I am going to maximize every opportunity, and push my self to the limit on everything I do.

Being the Best Me is about being me but better. That means, not trying to emulate or be envious of anyone else, only staying in my lane to reach my full potential.

These are the areas of life I'm focused on being better:

I've been slipping a bit in this area lately. Not only have I not being going to church consistently, but I need to step up my prayer life. In the battle of life, it's your most effective weapon.

Although I don't watch much TV I feel like I've watched more than normal lately and have been engaging in too many mindless activities lately. I guess that's why I make the joke that I feel like I'm losing IQ points. My goal is to go back to reading books and articles more to bring back my mental edge.

Addictive Behavior
Although I don't have an alcohol, nicotine, or drug addiction, there are other addictions that are not the healthiest. For example, I am addicted to sugar. My food addiction is what has helped my body get out of whack.

Health and Fitness
Which brings me here. I'm at the point that I'm totally tired of yo-yoing with weight, exercising, and body fat percentage. Although I know how to dress to hide my blubber, I'm not going to take my shirt off anywhere outside of the vicinity of my home. I'm looking to better my eating habits and learn to trick myself into liking exercising. A few weeks ago I was taken aback by the weight I gained. Unfortunately, no one had the gall to say that I was getting fat so I could get myself back focused.

As a company owner, a teacher, and having a leadership position in an organization, I want to step my leader game up. If I ever decide to have a family I need it there too. I really don't know how to besides just doing it but I'm open to suggestions.

The Best Thing I've Seen

Written on Wednesday, January 21, 2009 by Deeze

This is one of the greatest images seen in America in a long time. Everyone else is writing about Obama and his glorious and historical Inauguration, so I decided to focus on something that is equally or more important.

Let's get an understanding people... Obama isn't God and he can't snap his fingers and magically fix everything that W destroyed. In fact, it may take the President after him to see the fruits of Obama's labor (if we're not fooled or scared into electing another idiot). It's going to take time to fix this mess that Bush and company created.

The important thing showed in the picture is Bush leaving and with him, blank checks written to the rich and greedy as well as scare politics and incompetence. Hopefully, when he boarded that plane to go to Texas, he took the last 8 years of hell with him!

Welcome Mr. President Obama!!!

"Change Your Drawls, Change Your Luck"

Written on Tuesday, January 06, 2009 by Deeze

Happy New Year everyone!

For some reason, a phrase that I heard during my week in Atlanta, although pretty silly it has really stuck to me. The phrase is "Change Your Drawls, Change Your Luck." (For you all not familiar with the slang term "Drawls" it's another word for underwear) Although it goes against one of my core beliefs which is I don't believe in luck whatsoever, I actually like the concept of this phrase.

Each year, like everyone else I set goals but I actually set mine in December during my birthday. There are some things that I want to accomplish this year but there are not too many new things that I want to do honestly. The last two years were about expanding, getting experiences, and trying new things. This year, I'm concentrating on building the things that I already have which is plenty.... I realize I've been blessed the more and more I reflect on my life.

Being consistent is something that I struggle with from time to time, so my focus this year is the stay on the path. I'm trying to live "Change Your Drawls, Change Your Luck" therefore, I'm changing some of my methods from more as a freestyle back to a more structured method of accomplishing things.

For example, now my exercise time is 6am each morning although it's easier to workout in the evening..... I feel like to accomplish my fitness goals this year, I need to do different things. Also, I'm joining a yoga and kickboxing class in addition to my regular workout routine...."Change Your Drawls, Change Your Luck."

The most difficult thing about goal setting and accomplishment to me is to keep doing the things you do well, and incorporate new goals into your current methods. Whether it's in business, spiritual, fitness, love, or family.

Always remember.. if you do the same things, you'll get the same results.
"Change Your Drawls, Change Your Luck"

It's Cold As - F Outside!!

Written on Sunday, December 21, 2008 by Deeze

From my understanding, it is colder than a mutha..... outside. I checked the weather yesterday when I returned from my morning workout and realized that today's high would be 3 degrees (not the wind chill). That let me know, to be proactive by going to the grocery store, and shut myself in the house for the remainder of the day.

Fortunately, I have the NFL and a PS3 to keep me company when I don't want to leave my house. My friends wanted to meet up at a sports bar last night and today, but..... ummm.... that's a negative!

What people don't realize is although I was born and raised in Chicago, I hate cold weather more and more each year. The more winters I spend here, the more I plan on it being among my last winters :)

For those crazy people that want a white Christmas, come up here, and you'll see as much white as you want to see. I want a warm Christmas. Complete, with nice weather, BBQ for dinner, and a good NBA game...... Now that's a Happy Holiday!

Not feeling Blognificent!

Written on Wednesday, December 17, 2008 by Deeze

The Return of Mr. Blognificent hasn't been much of a return this year. It seems to get harder to write about things these days, especially since I've settled down and have no more crazy dating stories. I guess this year has been so much of a transition year as far as family, career, relationships, and personal issues that my inspiration for writing has subsided.

I look at it this way.... there's always next year!

So I'm going to try to re-commit myself to writing at minimum once per week even if it's a short post such as this.

Yet Another One

Written on Sunday, December 07, 2008 by Deeze

I've made it yet another year, and I'm glad about it!
I don't have very much to say during this blog, except for some random blabs.

I never thought it would be so difficult to regularly blog....
Has life now gotten boring?
I'm having difficulty coming up with material to blog about....

I'm excited for this new year of my life. I accomplished pretty much everything I wanted to last year, and this year, I plan on accomplishing more than I plan on.

Guess it's time to spruce up my life....
Look forward to new and fun stories!

Palin Power!!!

Written on Tuesday, November 04, 2008 by Deeze

Yeah right...
People in the south and midwest (Ohio), you really need to wake up. The civil war is over, and the Civil Rights bill was signed in 1965, so W A K E U P!!!
Little known history fact: "Red States" were "Blue States" before the Civil Rights bill was signed.... in other words they were Democrats. So what that tells me is these 'so called' conservatives don't believe in 'progress' aka they are predjudiced.

Also, those who had no other reason to support Hilary Clinton other than she was a woman, W A K E U P! I like Hilary Clinton as a politician but as the President, I felt like nothing too much would change. She's one of the people that supported the stupid war, and then talked about bringing troops home. If you supported the war, what makes me believe you'd be in a hurry to bring them home? You were under enemy fire in Bosnia? Ummmm no that was a lie. Crying during a speech? Character assination? That color doesn't fit you well. The list goes on... It has nothing to do with being a woman. Hell, Mickey and Minnie Mouse could have run if they posessed the right qualities. I really had respect for the Clintons until the dirty campaign, and the unnecessary lies that were told to voters. I believe America may FINALLY be tired of having their intelligence insulted. Bush did it for 8 years with 9/11, Katrina, Iraq, and Terror.

I have respect for McCain, but I don't know if he's in touch with the realities of the average person in America. However, I think picking Palin was yet another insult of America's intelligence. Then again, it wasn't that crazy of a pick. He knew that many of the Hilary supporters supported her because she was a woman, and really wouldn't be able to intelligently tell you another reason why they supported her. So logic says since that woman lost, let just throw another woman in there and these same misguided people will switch sides and vote for you. Yes, I said it.. I'm talking about femminist. Not people that advocate womens rights (I support them and am all for them) but pure femminist. They are as dangerous as the predjudiced. The main difference is beliefs are gender-based instead of race-based.

It's a damn shame that the election is this close because if Barack was a white man, it wouldn't AT ALL be as close as it is. There are many people out there will not vote for him for no other reason than he's black. Not for his beliefs, policies, or personality, but because of his skin. I'm not supporting Obama because he's black (however I'm proud of that fact), I'm supporting him because of his policies, his appearance of being different than the other Capital Hill politicians, and majority of his policies I believe in especially helping the middle class and the WORKING poor.

No, he isn't taking money out of people's pockets, he's redistributng taxes the way they SHOULD be.

Example: If I'm buying a $2000 LCD HDTV, should I pay LESS taxes than someone buying a $399 iPhone? Doesn't that just SOUND wrong to you? Well, thanks to Bush and the Republican party, that's EXACTLY what is happening for the rich.

From my angle Republicans don't like one or two types of people: Poor and Blacks (which sometimes are one in the same). What happened and what's happening in New Orleans a prime example of that. They believe that if you work hard, everyone can be rich and it will cause a 'trinkle down effect'.

Being Black in America has a different reality. If you work equally hard, you will get less, and if you work twice as hard, you might get equality. Being exceptional is the only way to overcome. However, what gives us hope is those exceptional people that have been able to overcome.

I'm not endorsing Barack because he has overcome but I'm endorsing Obama because he's the candidate that may can save this country from our freefall to becoming a third world country. No Barack will not be able to fix it in 8 years, but maybe be able to put us in the position to make it better after 2 terms. What Bush has done in 8 years will probably take 12-16 years to fix to get us back to the 90's era of profitablity and stability.

Please everyone, especially blacks please don't be lazy and go vote. Too many of our ancestors died for this right. For you to sit at home and criticize the process and how the 'White man' is keeping you down shows you are a loser. If the 'White Man' is keeping you down, prove him wrong, and show you're not lazy and exercize your right!

This is what the 'conservatives' think we're getting:

Here's the reality:

GTA Addicition

Written on Friday, October 31, 2008 by Deeze

Oh boy, here we go again. I'm addicted to Grand Theft Auto the video game AGAIN. A few years ago, I was addicted to GTA Vice City. It got so bad that I used to come home at lunch to play it. I worked 5 mins away from work then so it wasn't a major undertaking to come home, but it was the point of it. The excitement of being 'bad' and not having any consequences is addictive :)

It's started all over again. The first month that I got my PS3, I probably only played it 4 times at max. Now out of nowhere, I'm getting in a few minutes almost everyday. I usually don't play more than 30-45 but the point is I'm doing it 4+ days per week before I go to bed, lol.

GTA 4 is so addictive, I even got my girl to play it and she even got a little hypnotized playing it, and it's totally opposite of what anyone would think she'd enjoy. This game is so insane yet so much fun, it's like another world almost. Now with the graphics and HD game play, it looks so much more real than the PS2 version.

I do have one problem.... Parents are buying this game for their kids. That's totally ridiculous. There is so much violence, cursing, prostitues, pimps, drug dealing, etc., kids should not be allowed to play this game, it's strictly for adults.

At least now I'm getting my money's worth with my PlayStation now.

Student Confrontation

Written on Monday, October 27, 2008 by Deeze

Out of my 3 years teaching, I finally had my first real student confrontation. To make a long story short, she got mad because I caught her cheating. Let me ask my readers this..... If you're in school, and you're looking on someone else's screen for any reason, isn't that cheating during a test, a midterm at that? I didn't even fail her immediately but I asked her not to look at anyone else's screen, and if she did it again, she'd get an 0. Then she became disruptive, and I said if she can't stop talking she would immediately get a 0. She must have thought I was playing games.

I told her there is no discussion.. she has a 0 and she needs to leave immediately. That's when she got mad and started calling me crazy, lol. She kept yapping when I asked her to leave but then I was getting pissed because she was disturbing my other students while they were taking their exams.

She finally got her stuff and walked out, and I walked out right behind her because I was REALLY about to put this wench in her place. She then decided to not want to talk anymore, and I think she must have known I was about to light into her butt!

The problem is this student, doesn't half come to class, doesn't listen well, doesn't do the homework, and just got a book 4 weeks into class. She was spiraling towards an F anyway.

I honestly hope she doesn't come back but I'm sure I'll have to deal with some administrative stuff, but I honestly don't want her back in my class, and I'm calling the dean that tomorrow. When you work for a 'for-profit' school, the administration bends over backwards to give the students a free pass in my opinion, just to keep making money. I'm really (sarcastically) looking forward to that freggin conversation.

Love / Hate Relationship

Written on Sunday, October 26, 2008 by Deeze

Chicago and I have this love/hate relationship. Sometimes I'm happy here, sometimes I'm not. I believe sometime in the somewhat near future, I'm going to make a change, but where and when I have no idea. I'll see where my business takes me. I have a time and a plan in my head, but we'll see if it works out. While doing some business planning last night, I came up was just thinking about how much I love and hate Chicago at the same time.

I love it because:

  • This is where I was born and raised
  • This is where my mom and some of my friends are
  • The summertime is absolutely wonderful. Chicago is the perfect city for about 3 months out of the year to live in.
  • There is ALWAYS something to do, even free and cheap stuff
  • Chicago has a lot of cultural things to do, especially in the warmer months
  • Just because it's cold, life doesn't stop
  • Chicago has some of Nations best colleges i.e. Northwestern, U of Chicago, DePaul, Loyola
  • Strong multi-industry job market
  • It's easy to have fun dates here if you can find a quality woman to date because of the assortment of options of places to go

I hate it because:

  • The 'City of Chicago' is full of s#!* with taxes, and traffic tickets have completely gotten out of control
  • Segregation of this city is insane. I have to live downtown or up north to enjoy things of quality without having to drive for miles.
  • The traffic is insane at any random time of the day or night. Each night when I leave from teaching about 7 or 730, you would think it's 5 in the evening because traffic isn't moving. WTF?
  • December thru March. The weather is miserable!
  • Property is sky high in comparison to what you get. For a LITTLE more reasonable pricing, I'd have to move out of the loop areas. For me, living on the northside is ABSOLUTELY out of the question. I would never live anywhere north of Division because I don't feel comfortable there since there are not too many people that look like me in that side of town. My other options are the middle of nowhere (aka the burbs) or the southside and westside to get substandard stuff such as shopping, restaurants, bars, poor schools, among other things.
  • This is not a very good place to find a date (from a guy's perspective) unless I was interested in interracial dating. Some of us have gotten lucky, but it's definitely not a 'guys market' here as stated from many guys from here and visited here.

Tough Blogging

Written on Sunday, October 26, 2008 by Deeze

It has been really been tough to blog for pretty much this entire year for me. Normally, I have more topics to blog about than time to write them, but lately I haven't had the time nor the inspiration. However, as the end of 2008 approaches, I need to get my blog life back in order :)

In saying that, sometimes my blogs will be short and some will not make a whole lot of sense, but I'm going to dedicate myself to write 3-4 times per week if it's nothing but a sentence.

New Toy

Written on Tuesday, September 23, 2008 by Deeze

Ok..... I have finished making any electronic purchases over $100 for the year.
My latest toy is the PS3. I've been wanting one since they came out, but I've just been cheap, electing to buy other things.

Two Saturdays ago, I finally broke down and bought one with the encouragement of a few people. I've been playing video games since the days of the Coin-op Pac-Man. It's one of those things I still like to do, however I'm not by any stretch of the imagination a hard core gamer.

The funny part is, I've played it probably 3-4 times in the almost 2 weeks I've had it.

I know one thing... The PS3 is such a racket! Once you buy the freggin $399 system, you have to probably buy $200 worth of crap to get any decent usage out of it. It's actually like having a little computer though. It's pretty cool. It has it's own hard drive, connects to the internet, and has a Blu-Ray player.

Here's the things that you will need to buy in addition, in order to get full enjoyment:

  • The HDMI Cable - To play the games in High Definition
  • Games - Duh
  • Audio Cord - If you want to get 5.1 or 7.1 Dolby Sound from your games or Blu-Ray disc player
  • Blu-Ray Discs
  • 2nd Control Pad

It's definitely the most expensive toy I've ever bought.... next year my toy will be a scooter, if I can find a place that I can park it without having to pay for parking!

Difficultly In Blogging

Written on Monday, September 22, 2008 by Deeze

Why am I having such a hard time blogging these days. I'm not any more busy than normal, I am just not feeling the creative juices. I've had more than enough funny stories to blog about, as well as real life situations, but it's been difficult to pull them out of my head and type them on the screen.

I'm going to just write and see how disorganized my thoughts really are...
I haven't been feeling really "Blognificent" lately.